Oh …

Dec. 1st, 2016 01:21 am
blamebrampton: 15th century woodcut of a hound (Default)
[personal profile] blamebrampton
My mother rang me early this morning.

This is a thing she does occasionally, usually when I am working regular hours, or when she has turned up unexpectedly in the same city as me and thinks we should eat together. But sometimes, as today, because someone has died. This time it was her brother, my uncle. A difficult man, who neither of us was close to and who we both ended up on speaking terms with only after a lot of patience on our parts and effort on his.

So it is that strange sort of thing where you are sad that someone has died, and that they did not seem to be able to make happy choices much of the time, but know that you can't in fairness take a week out to be miserable about the whole thing, because you don't have a week's worth of decent memories to sustain it.

But I do recall a thing he said the last time we saw each other: that he wouldn't want to see Donald Trump as president of the USA. I feel that – not for the first time, though almost certainly for the last – he's taken a perfectly understandable position to an illogical extreme.

Date: 2016-11-30 02:27 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] illereyn.livejournal.com
I'm sorry to hear that about your uncle. *hugs*

Date: 2016-11-30 02:37 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] blamebrampton.livejournal.com
Cheers, ears. He was not well for the last few years of his life, but it was a shock to have him go suddenly. I do know that he had a fear of a lingering end, so I suppose that's something … Such an odd phrase. 'That's something' always makes me feel as though I have just said something along the lines of 'Well, at least he wasn't eaten slowly by lions …'

Date: 2016-11-30 02:30 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] takarai-karin.livejournal.com
Very sorry about your loss *hugs* if you want.
Edited Date: 2016-11-30 02:30 pm (UTC)

Date: 2016-11-30 02:34 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] blamebrampton.livejournal.com
Hugs are always welcome! And your icons are always such beautiful people, so it is like being cheered up by loveliness at the same time as a hug (exactly like, as you are a very lovely person).

Date: 2016-11-30 02:42 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] takarai-karin.livejournal.com
I'm glad I could cheer you up even just a bit :3

And thanks for the icon-love, that's Elly, he's a dancer, a grandma's boy, and a lovely human being that would, upon picking up a Happy Mother's Day card somebody lost in his concert venue would actually go and look for said mother amongst the concert goers (and found her!) to give her the card back. He would be happy to hear he's bringing some brightness into people's life.

Date: 2016-11-30 02:45 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] blamebrampton.livejournal.com
He sounds terrific! More people like Elly would be a very fine addition to the world right now!

Date: 2016-11-30 02:30 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mama-pyjama.livejournal.com
I didn't want to let let this pass unremarked. I am sorry for your loss, because even difficult people leave a hole in the fabric of your life. And your last line made me laugh, but also wince as it is also the sort of thing my difficult uncle would say...

Date: 2016-11-30 02:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] blamebrampton.livejournal.com
Thanks, dear! I'm just pleased he got to do a few fun things in his final year and we had a few conversations that neither of us wanted to actively flee from. Ten years ago I would have sworn both would be impossible goals.

Date: 2016-11-30 05:20 pm (UTC)
germankitty: (Default)
From: [personal profile] germankitty
I'm sorry for your loss. *hugs*

Date: 2016-12-01 12:25 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] blamebrampton.livejournal.com
Thanks, dear! We weren't close, but it's sad he died much younger than he had to.

Date: 2016-11-30 05:25 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] enchanted-jae.livejournal.com
I'm sorry to hear about your uncle.

Date: 2016-12-01 12:26 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] blamebrampton.livejournal.com
Thanks, Jae. Trying to work out the song list for his funeral now, because no-one else here knows anything about the Alan Parsons Project, his fave band.

Date: 2016-12-01 01:54 am (UTC)
ext_14638: (Default)
From: [identity profile] 17catherines.livejournal.com
I am sorry for your loss.

Date: 2016-12-01 12:27 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] blamebrampton.livejournal.com
Thanks, Cate. We weren't close, but it's sad.

Date: 2016-12-01 10:08 pm (UTC)
shyfoxling: Ravenclaw crest (Default)
From: [personal profile] shyfoxling
that he wouldn't want to see Donald Trump as president of the USA. I feel that – not for the first time, though almost certainly for the last – he's taken a perfectly understandable position to an illogical extreme.

*snerk* I saw similar remarks about Fidel Castro - apparently he once said something about swearing to live to see the US destroyed, so of course once we elected Trump he promptly kicked the bucket.

Date: 2016-12-02 05:54 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] valkyrie17.livejournal.com
Sorry for your loss. Even the difficult people in our lives leave us missing something when they are gone.

Date: 2016-12-02 03:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] winnett.livejournal.com
I'm sorry to hear it.

When my father died I was more pissed than sad... it was all due to his own poor choices. I wish you closure in any way, and never feel guilty about not feeling torn up about it.

Date: 2016-12-03 05:07 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dharawal.livejournal.com
I am sorry for your loss, unfortunately I felt much the same way when my father died, I just did not have that many pleasant memories that I could reflect on, and while I'm sad that he's gone, I'm not sad on my own behalf, but more for my Sister who is having trouble coming to terms with his passing. It hurts me tremendously to see her so upset and now coming to Christmas, the first one without him and also the anniversary of my mum's passing I'm worried at how she will cope.

Date: 2016-12-06 02:56 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nenne.livejournal.com
I'm sorry to hear about your uncle.

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