blamebrampton: 15th century woodcut of a hound (Default)
blamebrampton ([personal profile] blamebrampton) wrote2008-06-22 01:45 pm
Entry tags:

Serpentinelion drabble mini-fest

I think this is probably the first short short story I have written since I was about ten ... For [community profile] serpentinelion's mini-fest, and do check out other entries from pushdragon, sansa1970, lillithium, liriaen, potteresque_ire and rickey_a. They are all brilliant!




Title:
Decline and Fall
Author: blamebrampton
Rating: Soft R
Words: 500
Summary: The inside of her head was not where they ought to be.
A/N: Thanks [community profile] legomymalfoy, and [personal profile] pushdragon and the fiendfyre girls for the idea, encouragement and help.
Warnings: Ginny POV.



“Where is it this time?”

“Rome, but I’m not going.”

Harry kissed the top of Ginny’s head as he walked past her chair. “It’s too much fuss.”

“But all the others will be there.”

“S’pose. I’m off to shower. Coming to bed?”

“In a minute.”

Ginny watched him walk away. She glanced back down at the table, where the Prophet’s front page was dominated by news of the upcoming conference. Hermione smiled shyly out of a photograph. Behind her Draco Malfoy walked purposefully across the frame. He glanced towards the camera, august and imperial, then stalked away. She watched it three times.

She turned the paper over, and walked to their bedroom, where the rest of this conversation always happened.

The first line was hers. “Are you sure?”

Harry’s damp head poked out of the bathroom. “Sure of what?”

“Missing the Senate, it’s a chance to network.”

Look down from the Palantine hill for him.

“You know I don’t care about that.”

There was the smile, and those honest eyes. He tucked his towel around his hips as she slid past him, reaching for her toothbrush.

“But you can talk to other Aurors about your reforms.”

Walk down narrow streets, following a fair head.

“Kingsley can do it.”

“Harry, you know you’re the one they want to meet.”

Meet with that other in an ancient hotel.

“That’s just fame.”

“It’s your triumph.”

Over her, over him.

She put her toothbrush down and smiled at him in the mirror.

“You want to, admit it.”

“I want to stay here, with you.” He stood close behind her and nuzzled her hair.

She only knew about the once. Before he had come to find her, in the weeks after the war ended. When everything was insane. When people turned to each other blindly. Neville had let it slip over too much drink, a secret so incomprehensible it couldn’t be kept.

“You should go.”

There were many times she didn’t know about, could not be sure of. Every time she let him leave, she imagined him wrapped around that pale, straight form.

“You should come to bed.” He dropped the towel, and she felt his cock begin to rouse, nudging her from behind as his hands slipped the sundress from her shoulders.

She went. And while he murmured gentle words and made soft movements, she pictured him hard and desperate, bruising cool whiteness beneath hands he never let be strong with her. Saying cruel things, and being loathed in return. An eternal contest, dictated by need. Not the peaceful concord of their home.

The pictures in her mind played their part. She pulled him tight, and wondered if he would notice if she tilted her hips too far, moved him to that place strange for her, perhaps familiar to him.

And tomorrow, when he would go, but with her scent on him, she wondered if the other would know it. And whether she would haunt his bed as surely as he haunted hers.
ext_14590: (Default)

[identity profile] meredyth-13.livejournal.com 2008-06-22 06:01 am (UTC)(link)
Damn it... I will NOT like Ginny... I ... oh hell, this is good.

I can't express how this is making me feel. I want to say devastated, but that's not it. It's... guh. So few words, and this should have chapters.

It's beautifully written, but the subject disturbs me. My first impression was to like and admire Ginny. But then... I thought - hang on, no! Because it's all conjecture for the most part - she's believing something that may be only her own imagination, and part of her seems to be getting off on the idea. She's creating her own martyrdom by nobly sending him off each time, rather than facing him honestly with her suspicions. Basically pushing him into situations where he can continue to sin in her mind, regardless of whether he does in reality. No, I don't admire her after all - and I suspect Harry's damned whether he does or doesn't.

Hmmm... maybe I'm just overthinking things, but this really has my brain and emotions going.

Did I mention that this is an incredibly powerful piece of writing? I'll just take my mental dissections over here and be quiet now, except for the coughing.

*hugs*

How's the ears, honey? Hope you're on the mend.

[identity profile] sesheta-66.livejournal.com 2008-06-22 06:40 am (UTC)(link)
Ooooh! I liked this. Feel free to write short short stories more often.

The look through a doubting Ginny's mind is quite powerful.

[identity profile] pushdragon.livejournal.com 2008-06-22 08:33 am (UTC)(link)
Mmmmm lovely, lovely psychology. I like the way you write Harry here - he is so utterly convincing, but I suppose adulterers have to be. On the other hand ... what if Neville got it all wrong and everything is in Ginny's head? I like the suspense of having no idea which version is true.

And I like this description especially: "a secret so incomprehensible it couldn’t be kept".

[identity profile] snottygrrl.livejournal.com 2008-06-22 09:35 am (UTC)(link)
my ability to string more than two words together has fled, was going to was going to finish a v. v. short ficlet tonight and post but realised before i entirely embarrassed myself that it was completely hopeless.

that being said, this fic is beautiful and heart-wrenching and after this week i've had makes me want to weep uncontrollably.

glad to hear your ears are a bit on the mend. also meant to write back to you today and you see how far i've gotten on that one [*flails*]

[identity profile] melusinahp.livejournal.com 2008-06-22 09:38 am (UTC)(link)
I have such a weird thing for H/D fics in which Ginny knows and accepts/approves of it.

This is a gorgeous example. :)

[identity profile] libby-drew.livejournal.com 2008-06-22 12:36 pm (UTC)(link)
Still love it. ;) The part you added -- where I'd had a question before -- is perfect. Now I feel her desperation and bitter arousal. A wonderful contribution to the fest.
potteresque_ire: (Default)

[personal profile] potteresque_ire 2008-06-22 03:10 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh, this is perfect! Razor sharp at 500 words, and the interplay between Harry and Draco are so real, and so haunting - they show how complex the human psyche can be, how can twist and ensare what it desires without betraying a single clue. And I also love that you place in the issue with cheating and / or past relationship ... few people are truly able to let go; if it has happened once, then it will forever be suspected.

This... and the other piece I've read of yours recently... I am completely floored with the way you capture the way our mind works. *fangirls*

[identity profile] vaysh11.livejournal.com 2008-06-22 03:45 pm (UTC)(link)
Wow! This is a hard scenario to pull off (would be for me, anyways) but you do it so well. I love how you interweave Ginny's suspicions, half-knowledge, her subtle temptations, her fantasising about the possible nature of a sexual relationship between Harry and Draco. And of course - that dream of Imperial Rome. I love how you use the imagery of white aristocratic marble to emphasise the difference between the two worlds that Ginny, and Draco represent for Harry (in this Ginny's mind at least).

[identity profile] romaine24.livejournal.com 2008-06-22 04:02 pm (UTC)(link)
I think you captured the side of 'wondering if your partner is having an affair or not' very well. Painfully well (but a good kind of pain *g*).

The wanting to leave a scent and mark him in some way letting the other know that she was still part of the picture was perfect.

[identity profile] beatnikspinster.livejournal.com 2008-06-22 04:04 pm (UTC)(link)
This was haunting. I feel her pain as she destroys her own relationship. Very human rendering of Ginny and her faults. *applauds you*

Harry is sexy here. Towel. Removing towel. No more towel. Just stiffee, stiffee, stiffee!!!! *pant*

[identity profile] mahaliem.livejournal.com 2008-06-22 07:06 pm (UTC)(link)
This was a lovely piece of writing. Ginny's knowing and suspecting more, of imagining Harry and Draco together, was exquisitely painful.

[identity profile] jadzialove.livejournal.com 2008-06-22 07:55 pm (UTC)(link)
I just read this again, while more awake. I've decided that I feel very sorry for Ginny. Because either way she's sort of screwed, isn't she?

Even if Harry isn't having it off with Draco on the sly, she's created this sort of horrible mental cage for herself.

Nicely done in so few words.
who_la_hoop: (Default)

[personal profile] who_la_hoop 2008-06-23 01:17 pm (UTC)(link)
Poor Ginny! She'll drive herself mad thinking like that. I bet Harry isn't cheating on her.

(Waugh's Decline and Fall, by the by, often wars with Stella Gibbons' Cold Comfort Farm for the dubious honour of being crowned My Favourite Book Ever. I love it so so much.)

[identity profile] pingrid.livejournal.com 2008-06-23 03:16 pm (UTC)(link)
Ooh, I like the ambiguity and the realistic human stupidity of this! I find it interesting how you paint their marriage as strong; so strong that Ginny will encourage him to go to where Malfoy is even though she thinks she knows he'll be unfaithful to her, not for the first time. And how she hates Malfoy for it, not Harry, which is such a normal yet infuriating reaction!

And at the same time their marriage is so weak because they don't bloody talk to each other about the important things. Gah! It makes me want to tear my hair and scream at them for being so stupid - and then realise I've done the same in the past and should just shut up. ;)

I'm impressed at how much is here in so few words. :)

Also, cock!

[identity profile] calanthe-fics.livejournal.com 2008-06-28 02:17 pm (UTC)(link)
Ooh, that is so unlike the cosy comfort of your normal stuff. There's a real lump-in-the=back-of-the-throat vibe, and the knowledge that the adult in the relationship is Ginny. That she can be so pragmatic whilst still so attached to Harry is something few people could do, although I believe it completely from these few words.

[identity profile] whimseywisp.livejournal.com 2008-07-17 05:28 pm (UTC)(link)
Wow, this was absolutely fantastic. I need to read short stories more often!

[identity profile] wailing-owl.livejournal.com 2009-05-28 08:28 pm (UTC)(link)
Somehow I think I managed to miss your fic before, despite all my reading. :) This is the only one I had time to read today, and it was brilliant. To me it feels slightly out-of-focus, not the writing but her thoughts, the way it feels when what you can admit you're thinking and what you're really thinking are two different things. And this line: "...beneath hands he never let be strong with her." It caught me the first time through, and on a second reading it makes me think she's inventing the affair with Draco in order to make excuses for why her marriage doesn't satisfy her. It's my guess that Harry's not really cheating at all. BTW, were those first couple of italicised lines yours? They read like quotes from some classic poem, and I love the mood they add to the piece. I'll stop wittering now. Great story!
ext_407600: harry (Default)

[identity profile] leemarchais.livejournal.com 2013-06-11 05:22 am (UTC)(link)
Damn, brammers. That was intense for so few words. Very intense. I liked every word of it, though.

khiel groton's proclaims

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