blamebrampton: 15th century woodcut of a hound (Default)
blamebrampton ([personal profile] blamebrampton) wrote2010-07-16 11:55 pm

He has other charms ...

I am not a Romantic.

For most of you reading this will come as no surprise to hear, since although I don't mind the odd bit of romance, Satire, Rationalism, Pragmatism and Grumpy Old Haggisism are terms that will more readily spring to mind. And this is largely because you have never seen me.

Because the problem is: my inside and outside do not match. I look like a figure dropped out of an historical painting (thanks to genetics), and dress like someone from a children's book (thanks to a fashion sense grounded in comedy). To the casual observer, I look the sort of person who has a large gold-framed mirror, a fainting couch and a velvet-lined box filled with old billets-doux.

In the past, this caused me some issues, particularly with men. Indeed, when I was a young lass, there were several who sent unsolicited billets-doux and only ceased after the third or fourth returned with corrections, style annotations and a suggested reading list. By much dint of effort I was able to convince my general acquaintance that I was a woman of practical taste and that it was of far more interest to me whether you could run ten miles and fix a saddle than quote Dante Gabriel Rosetti. Because I had horses and I hate the Pre-Raphaelite poets.

It is possible, however, that I may have taken things a little too far.

Yesterday was the 15th anniversary of my dalliance with Mr Brammers (we live in sin, but quite conventionally so). I had suggested we might go out somewhere and held a vague hope that he could have organised such a thing, perhaps even with a small token of affection, such as a book, or an orange-inked pen. When I staggered in late from work after 7, I half-hoped to be bundled back out the door on an Adventure. Instead, he was playing internet spaceships in his underwear.

Which is fine, he needs his relaxation time. So I suggested that I refresh myself and he come out as soon as he had finished this particular step in defending the galaxy and we head off to one of the many local eateries that can be relied on to provide good nosh without a booking. I had a little read, and a little sit-down, and by then it was 8pm. I popped my head back into the study, he apologised without looking around, his corps were in the middle of something complex and now was a bad time.

Being ever-resilient, I offered to go and gather foodstuffs for us from the local shops, which is how we ended up having fish and chips. I shared my salmon with the Monster cat, while Mr B shouted out that he would be out in a minute, they were nearly done. After completing my dinner, I returned to my book.

Some little time later, I noticed that he was quiet. Investigation revealed that he had gone for a little lie down. Obviously in preparation for significant efforts later in the evening, I assumed. Or ... as I was forced to conclude when he was still snoring at 1am and I had run out of things to knit, read, or comment about on the internet ... not.

So given it was Thursday, and hence bin night, I took the bins down for him (it's his job), had a shower and went to bed. Whereupon he threw an arm across my hips and snurfled something that may have been 'Luxembourg'.

Still, better than 15 years of bad poetry!

[identity profile] blamebrampton.livejournal.com 2010-07-16 03:00 pm (UTC)(link)
Thanks, dear! And for all that he is a numpty on some things, he is a lovely lad, really!

[identity profile] alex-s9.livejournal.com 2010-07-16 03:06 pm (UTC)(link)
Yes, just like my husband. Everyone loves him and he's puttig up with with me, so he must be a saint.

Just really unnerving saint, but I guess they all were.

And he's well-hung, too. :D

[identity profile] dysonrules.livejournal.com 2010-07-16 03:07 pm (UTC)(link)
*snorfles* I've discovered that when you want "romantic" you have to create it yourself because that gene does not come with the Y chromosome. But yeah, I'd take Luxembourg over an empty bed any day. :D

[identity profile] blamebrampton.livejournal.com 2010-07-16 03:08 pm (UTC)(link)
It's an important consolation!

[identity profile] shocolate.livejournal.com 2010-07-16 03:17 pm (UTC)(link)
you are both perfectly imperfect.

we have been married for 18 years - this all sounds very familiar...

eta : how odd is it that I got a small thrill out of also having a Thursday bin night?
Edited 2010-07-16 15:18 (UTC)

[identity profile] blamebrampton.livejournal.com 2010-07-16 03:21 pm (UTC)(link)
Eh, I can always get myself something nice. And I suspect that Luxembourg is Asleep for Loves you babe (why his endearments sound like Kojak, I cannot tell you ;-))

[identity profile] blamebrampton.livejournal.com 2010-07-16 03:29 pm (UTC)(link)
Perfectly imperfect is exactly right! And a perfect man would be ghastly, anyway, what would we talk to our friends about?

It's not odd at all! I share your thrill and a sense that all the best people have a Thursday bin night.

[identity profile] bryoneybrynn.livejournal.com 2010-07-16 03:32 pm (UTC)(link)
Hee. this made me laugh. And yeah, I love my hubby. We've been together 9 years as of last month, but oh, he only does exactly what he's told with the gestures. If I want flowers, I have to say "I want flowers." If I want a card too, I have to say "I want flowers and a card." This birthday I made the mistake of NOT specifying I wanted a card (figuring my 8 previous birthdays would have tipped him off). yeah, no card. And then an argument about going out at 10pm to get a card (him: but I feel bad; me: well I'd rather have you here right now then an after-the-fact card, so if you go, you're only going for yourself and not for me and it's my birthday; him: but I feel bad; me: you should. now sit down.)

Good thing they have so many other positive attributes! *g*

[identity profile] blamebrampton.livejournal.com 2010-07-16 03:40 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh Mr Brynn ... the card is the most important part! At least Mr Brammers knows that rule.

And yes, they do score points back for the loyalty, comedy, bedwarming and getting things down off the top shelves ;-)
femmequixotic: (xxflissxx/keira_laughing)

[personal profile] femmequixotic 2010-07-16 03:44 pm (UTC)(link)
Does it help if I admit that, at times, it can be like this even with women? :D

Congratulations on your anniversary, hon. Fifteen years is fantastic. \0/

[identity profile] calanthe-fics.livejournal.com 2010-07-16 03:47 pm (UTC)(link)
The bastard.

That deserves a phantom faulty computer connection for, oh, at least a week.

[identity profile] blamebrampton.livejournal.com 2010-07-16 03:49 pm (UTC)(link)
Before I met him, 15 days was quite good, so Mr B is a new leaf! And he is so very good with the cats ;-)

And yes, it is good to know I am not alone, and I have to confess that I am quite dreadful when it comes to this sort of stuff, too, but I was rather hoping for a decent dinner. Or, you know, shag.

[identity profile] blamebrampton.livejournal.com 2010-07-16 03:51 pm (UTC)(link)
Well, if he comes through with a good meal or shag on the weekend, I'll consider us even. And if he finally cleans the kitchen, I'll do the bins next week, too!
femmequixotic: (Default)

[personal profile] femmequixotic 2010-07-16 03:57 pm (UTC)(link)
Being good with the cats helps...and yet, it doesn't excuse the lack of anniversary shagging, woe. :)

[identity profile] vaysh11.livejournal.com 2010-07-16 04:44 pm (UTC)(link)
I had ice coffee and one scoop of vanilla ice-cream was totally for you. ♥

[identity profile] ladyjaneva.livejournal.com 2010-07-16 05:02 pm (UTC)(link)
*giggles*

If I were you, I'd throw a hissy fit the next day, because I like my bit of drama, babe.

But he loves animals, right? Can't be all bad ;-)

Alles Gute zum Jahrestag :-)

[identity profile] mahaliem.livejournal.com 2010-07-16 05:12 pm (UTC)(link)
For something mumbled when half-asleep, Luxembourg isn't all that bad.

Albania or Malaysia might have been promising something he couldn't deliver at the time while Yemen could be grounds for a serious discussion.

[identity profile] inamac.livejournal.com 2010-07-16 07:02 pm (UTC)(link)
But look at it this way - this post has given inestimable pleasure, and loads of stifled chortles to a host of your internet fiends...

It must be twue lurve.

[identity profile] http://users.livejournal.com/_inbetween_/ 2010-07-16 07:38 pm (UTC)(link)
*lopsided scrunchy face grin*
now I remember my own shame at realising silly expectations, what with not even having the look or wardrobe
*squish*

[identity profile] http://users.livejournal.com/_inbetween_/ 2010-07-16 07:40 pm (UTC)(link)
If I don't do it daily, I gag on stench or get harrassed by neighbours, oh you cool and fresh Australia ;)

[identity profile] miriravan.livejournal.com 2010-07-16 09:13 pm (UTC)(link)
As one who has never been in an intimate/romantic relationship of any description, I find your account ridiculously charming. Happy Anniversary anyway! :)

[identity profile] shiv5468.livejournal.com 2010-07-16 09:34 pm (UTC)(link)
After fifteen years you are allowed to trade him in for a newer model.

[identity profile] catsintheattic.livejournal.com 2010-07-16 09:46 pm (UTC)(link)
It are posts like this one that still have me believe in love.

Congrats, dear, to you both!

&hearts

[identity profile] pinque.livejournal.com 2010-07-16 10:13 pm (UTC)(link)
Sounds like bliss to me ;) No really. I get freaked out by extreme devotion and romance. And I too look like I was snatched from a painting- preRaph. most probably. It gets worse the more outrageously red I colour my hair. i think I'll go for big chunks of different colours next time...

ext_14590: (Merlin WTF)

[identity profile] meredyth-13.livejournal.com 2010-07-16 10:22 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm a WoW widow - I feel your pain.

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