When walking, I've taken to stopping and standing perfectly still when a numbnuts walker comes my way. I plaster a look of 'Are you seriously this incompetent?' all over my face and then brace myself so that if they do barge into me, they connect with a solid shoulder and/or elbow. The one time someone grizzled at me after walking into me, I said; "I was standing still, you managed to walk straight into me. I hope you don't drive like that!' and he huffed and walked off.

The good thing about being middle-aged is that I have no problem with shouting at people these days. 'Heads up!', 'Watch what you're doing!' and 'Oi! Eyes!' are frequently passing my lips. And, when cycling, 'USE YOUR EYES!' at people who step out without looking. I like to think of it as road safety education rather than being a mad old lady …