blamebrampton: 15th century woodcut of a hound (Default)
blamebrampton ([personal profile] blamebrampton) wrote2008-08-21 11:02 pm

Quanto costa ...

... generosità?

Yesterday's anonymous meme brought the predictable fallout, As I said to a friend of mine who was hammered viciously, but who is at least smart enough not to take it personally: anonymous people on the internet are rude cocks. WHO KNEW?

That said, I also asked her why she hadn't just asked me to poke her in the eyes, because it would have been more fun. At least for me!

Some people were lovely and kind and made each other feel happy. Others were honest and thoughtful and raised issues that they thought were important, but in reasonable ways. Still others were rude cocks. (I AM SHOCKED!)

But you're always going to get that last set. And it's ridiculous. If I went mad and said "tell me what you don't like about me", it would be a pointless exercise. I know the answers that people would give. I know me a million times better than anyone in lj land does, and that includes people who I count as good friends, several of whom have that title IRL.

This is true of everyone, so why hand the ability to be unkind over to other people? Is it masochism? A misplaced sense of toughness? Too lazy for a spot of self-abuse (not that kind of ... oh, all right, whatever kind you like.)

I just don't get it.

It's like some of my RL friends who like to cause maximum carnage when they are upset and drag as many people as they can down in the crossfire or morass. I find that mentally exhausting with them, and they are all people who actually have bought me drinks. Why would anyone play that game with virtual strangers?

[personal profile] deense, who lives near me, and I were talking about why people react so strongly to others in fandom. She started off by saying that people in fandom are easily excited. 'OMG! I like X and you like X! Let's talk about X! And then we can write fic!' So they start off with this fun sense of bonding, but after a while they're all 'HOW CAN YOU NOT LIKE Y? What is WRONG with you? Crappy X lover!' And they confuse one shared interest with genuine similarity.

I agreed, and said that what I saw last night went a step further. People had this insane sense of self-decreed entitlement and authority. 'It is,' I said, 'as though you have this great relationship and then he comes home to meet your parents and he's all "YOUR PARENTS ARE NUDISTS?! How could you not have told me this? Our relationship is built on lies! Vile spawn of nudists and their corrupting exposed bits!!" except, instead of actually being your boyfriend, this is the person on the bus with whom you have a great smiling and holding a queue spot for relationship, and you're left gaping and asking: "Why are you in my family home?"'

Aside from this, I had a moment of panic about the appallingness of my Italian, so I purchased several books and CDs, and a giant dictionary of doom, and a children's book to practise with. There were a lot of books about, but I was tremendously lame and was unable to resist purchasing the one that began:

Gli abitanti de Little Hangleton la chiamavono ancora Casa Riddle, anche se erano passati tanti anni da quando i Riddle ci abitavano ...

I will pick up some Dante when I remember how to read Italian beyond textile articles.

[identity profile] blamebrampton.livejournal.com 2008-08-21 03:43 pm (UTC)(link)
It makes no sense!

I say that all the time.

Quanto costa questo paio di guanti?

[identity profile] pingrid.livejournal.com 2008-08-21 03:47 pm (UTC)(link)
I believe you - you almost had me writing Draco/Caspian for a while there, before I remembered that I should really struggle with my crossfest fic instead. The pretty!

I'm intrigued too, by the way, although it does make me feel dirty. At least I'm dirty with Brammers, not bad compay! :D Can you email me too? username at techarea dot net. Or, you could just tell me to mind my own business. ;)

[identity profile] blamebrampton.livejournal.com 2008-08-21 03:48 pm (UTC)(link)
This is getting pornier by the moment ...

[identity profile] pingrid.livejournal.com 2008-08-21 03:51 pm (UTC)(link)
È libero! Un regalo per voi, bella signora. :x

One word for free is as good as another, y/y?

I really must learn some Italian.
Edited 2008-08-21 15:58 (UTC)

[identity profile] pingrid.livejournal.com 2008-08-21 03:55 pm (UTC)(link)
Huh! It's no porn of mine - not nearly enough sweat, snot or cocks. ;)

[identity profile] romaine24.livejournal.com 2008-08-21 03:56 pm (UTC)(link)
I didn't participate in the MEME by posting anon or asking for anon. It's got scary written all over it. The last thing I need is my muse to get his feelings hurt. He's a sensative bastard, unlike me. *g*

[identity profile] empress-jae.livejournal.com 2008-08-21 04:01 pm (UTC)(link)
oh the draco/caspian quest is not over my pretty. i'll get at least a hundred smutty words out of you. :D

keep an eye on your email...

[identity profile] pir8fancier.livejournal.com 2008-08-21 04:07 pm (UTC)(link)
I don't participate in anything like that for the obvious reason that I ABHOR the anonymous aspect of these stupid memes. You have something nice to say to me, say it to my face so that I can cyber hug you. You have something nasty to say to me, then please, let's discuss your objections to my presence on this planet. I think these sort of exercises bring out the WORST in people. And what's to stop someone from saying all sorts of nice things to a person on their LJ anyway. Hmmm?

[identity profile] blamebrampton.livejournal.com 2008-08-21 04:25 pm (UTC)(link)
Now I'm not sure if I want to buy gloves, lead a revolution or schmooze with the kind shopkeeper ...

[identity profile] sesheta-66.livejournal.com 2008-08-21 04:28 pm (UTC)(link)

[identity profile] norton-gale.livejournal.com 2008-08-21 04:30 pm (UTC)(link)
I agree with the masses. No point in soliciting anonymous flames. I think it's curiosity that makes people sign up. If something's really bugging someone I hope they'd have the cojones to say it to my face.

If you signed up, I would say that I hate that you live about a million miles away!

[identity profile] blamebrampton.livejournal.com 2008-08-21 04:32 pm (UTC)(link)
I hate that I can't be there to show you my bad haircut photos while we drink tea and giggle!

[identity profile] blamebrampton.livejournal.com 2008-08-21 04:33 pm (UTC)(link)
Well, I think you're quite clever, and I like clever!

[identity profile] blamebrampton.livejournal.com 2008-08-21 04:33 pm (UTC)(link)
The craziness was just too crazy ...

[identity profile] norton-gale.livejournal.com 2008-08-21 04:34 pm (UTC)(link)
Well, you can always send them to me! :D

I need to find a way to call Australia again.

hello, new friend.

[identity profile] aldehyde.livejournal.com 2008-08-21 04:44 pm (UTC)(link)
i don't understand any italian but haha! that looks like the italian version of goblet of fire, maybe ? how nerdily awesome :D

i have always wanted to read dante. it's been on the to-read list for EVER.

as for the anon meme, i tried to provide concrit when i wasn't being downright nice. i don't really have anyone on the flist that i don't like so there was no need for me to be catty ;)

it's just the nature of ANYTHING anonymous that brings out the worst in ppl. b/c either they're jealous or unhappy or SOMETHING with the person being evaluated, and they don't have the balls to be upfront about it. also, some ppl just like confrontation. the internet simply makes all this easier to do b/c a) either you're being totally anonymous and can't be tracked and b) even if you can be identified, you're doing this over the computer, so what are the chances that the person you're bitching at will come up to your face and ask you to justify yourself?

i've seen soooooooooo much internet drama over the last decade that it's not even funny anymore. it's just sort of sick and saddening.

[identity profile] pir8fancier.livejournal.com 2008-08-21 04:44 pm (UTC)(link)
Only American clever, which seems quite pale when compared with English/Aussie clever!

::cyber hug::

[identity profile] pingrid.livejournal.com 2008-08-21 04:45 pm (UTC)(link)
A sexual revolution with a glove fetish, perhaps?

[identity profile] leochi.livejournal.com 2008-08-21 04:50 pm (UTC)(link)
*g* You know, you could alternately read a part of the English copy and then return to the Italian one; with your wit and intelligence I'm sure you would catch on very quickly.

Some people have boring lives, I suppose, so drama adds some spice to it. Not everybody is as sensible and reasonable as you are, I guess. And some are plainly silly.

Don't worry about commenting - I'm glad the pics made you smile every day - I had fun doing them, but alas, my holidays are fading away quicker than lightning and next week will see me back at school; so I suppose I won't be as prolific anymore.

[identity profile] blamebrampton.livejournal.com 2008-08-21 05:07 pm (UTC)(link)
Apparently we can become addicted to internet spaceships and use their VOIP ... *eyes J crankily ...*

I am still trying to find some extra cash to visit. Alas, I accidentally spent $500 on books today. Oops!

Re: hello, new friend.

[identity profile] blamebrampton.livejournal.com 2008-08-21 05:14 pm (UTC)(link)
You are quite right, and yes, it is the nerdiest thing I have done in a very long time (aside from taking up fic, shhh.)

Dante is GREAT, but I have only read him in translation. I'll let you know what he's like in Italian ... in about a year ...

It just surprises me that people would exert that much energy to make other people feel like crap. Surely for the same amount of effort they could go down the pub and pull, or make a cake, or learn to knit. Gah! Anyway, WELCOME. Glad to see you, you seem rather cool and PLU*, hurrah!

*People like Us, in case you're under 35. In which case, PLU, but younger;-)

[identity profile] blamebrampton.livejournal.com 2008-08-21 05:16 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh it's exactly the same, we just have better references taught in our schools. Quoting Shakespeare has a certain gravitas that Twain sadly doesn't (even though Twain is a genius).

[identity profile] tray-la-la.livejournal.com 2008-08-21 06:08 pm (UTC)(link)
*dies*

i actually rolled around on my bed laughing at that bit about the bus queue buddy.

and yes, as i said on my journal, i believe it is emotional masochism. having a friend poke you in the eyes would definitely be more fun. for all parites.

(oh, and this is tlp2107. i changed my name!)

[identity profile] painless-j.livejournal.com 2008-08-21 08:04 pm (UTC)(link)
I genuinely don't understand the mindset of the people who take part, either commenting anon (not to mention say nasty things anon!) OR asking for it. I just don't understand. If I want to say something nice to somebody, I'll say it to their face. Let them have context along with the compliment. If I'm too chicken to do it, let it be my problem (general 'I'; I myself is never too scared to speak up; more of the opposite). If I ever want to say something nasty or snide, I'll make myself leave my computer station and go do something else to cool down. It's not worth it to say something with the purpose to hurt. It would diminish me first.

And I don't understand the wish to hear anon 'honesty'. I mean, dude, you talk with people in fandom day after day and see them talk among themselves. Can't you say what they think of you by what they say to you and how they do it? Even if one can't evaluate such thing by observation (say, having too low or two high self-esteem), this meme won't give them an accurate picture. It will often give you a random one, and even more often, unnecessarily hurtful and warped one. So I simply don't see the point. Just drama-seeking?

All these words were just to say 'word' or something like that :)

[identity profile] abusing-sarcasm.livejournal.com 2008-08-21 08:09 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm stupid and I thought people would say nice things and maybe a few nitpicks.

I should have known better. I mean, I do know better. I've been around the block. I know how people are. But it seemed like a fun idea. I didn't think people would take it as a chance to act like rude cocks, at least not completely.

Consider me chastened.

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