blamebrampton: 15th century woodcut of a hound (Default)
blamebrampton ([personal profile] blamebrampton) wrote2014-06-09 12:47 am

My day

Horse: Neeeeeiiiiiiigh! My friends have all left me! I am bereft! NEEEEEEIIIIIIIIGGGGHHHHH!

Brammers: Hello, horse. I have been told by your owner that it's fine for me to come and pat and groom you, so here I am! Come over here and let me pat you! If we get on, I will find a brush and brush you!

Horse: Do you have an apple?

Brammers: No.

Horse: Carrot?

Brammers: Sorry.

Horse: You've got grass, haven't you?

Brammers: 'fraid so. But it comes with pats and chin scratches if you get close enough!

Horse: OK, I come closer. Yay, grass. Whoopee. Note my sarcasm.

Brammers: And now, patting!

Horse: Come closer to the fence, little human!

Brammers: Come closer to the fence, big horse!

Horse: Hee hee hee! I have my revenge planned for the grass! Come just a little closer to the fence! You will love it, little human. Heee!!!! Oooh, you can reach me. Ooooh, you have nails! And you have got that bit on my chin, and neck nuzzles, oooooohhhh … I am just going to come a little closer to you …

Brammers: And I will come a little closer to you …

Fence: ZAP!!!!!!

[Which went straight from my hip out my hand and into Mr Horse]

Brammers: Fuck! I cannot believe I fell for that!

Horse: I feel betrayed. Mostly by myself.


In happier news, I got to play with a hand-reared barn owl and barking owl. Barn owls are ridiculously like kittens, with soft everything and insatiable desire for pats!

[identity profile] sassy-cissa.livejournal.com 2014-06-08 03:02 pm (UTC)(link)
OMG!!! I'm sorry that I'm laughing so hard at your misfortune. Hope you're okay and keep an apple in your pocket. :P ♥

[identity profile] blamebrampton.livejournal.com 2014-06-08 03:13 pm (UTC)(link)
I knew I should have gone and secured something bribey before I ventured over. Alas, all I had on me was a satsuma, which is usually the horse equivalent of Brussels sprouts.

At least someone gets some joy from the incident :-P

[identity profile] connorblond.livejournal.com 2014-06-08 03:20 pm (UTC)(link)
Hahahaha! That happens with horses!

Wow - owls! So cool :)

[identity profile] uminohikari.livejournal.com 2014-06-08 06:38 pm (UTC)(link)
I thought "barking owl" was a typo until I wiki'd it. Australia is a strange place.
azurelunatic: Vivid pink Alaskan wild rose. (Default)

[personal profile] azurelunatic 2014-06-08 07:22 pm (UTC)(link)
Ow!

But yay owls!

[identity profile] enchanted-jae.livejournal.com 2014-06-09 12:22 am (UTC)(link)
*guffaws*

I bet you won't do that again. Once shocked, twice shy.

...

Maybe all the electric shocks I got in my youth can account for my addled dotage.

*muses*

[identity profile] anna-wing.livejournal.com 2014-06-09 01:54 am (UTC)(link)
I am cautious of horses and ponies. Ponies because the first one I said hello to tried to eat my arm, and horses because I find them skittish and unpredictable, which I don't like, especially when I am sitting on one. The absence of an off-switch is deeply unnerving.

[identity profile] ecosopher.livejournal.com 2014-06-09 02:16 am (UTC)(link)
Oh dear. Electric fences bite! (Glad the horse didn't though).

Owls! How wonderful! I love owls.

[identity profile] valkyrie17.livejournal.com 2014-06-09 06:07 am (UTC)(link)
Owls and horses? Me likey:)

[identity profile] phoenixacid.livejournal.com 2014-06-09 03:30 pm (UTC)(link)
Awww I wish I could play with the owls and horsie too! :)))

[identity profile] sinden.livejournal.com 2014-06-10 12:23 am (UTC)(link)
Ahahahahahahahahaha. Just, yes. My brother did tht ones -- except he ended up straddling an electric fence.