Of Great Price, Part III

[blamebrampton]

Things turned around for us at the start of 1980 when Millicent Bagnold became Minister for Magic. She was ferocious – foul tempered and bloody minded. In the first days of her term she had a sweep of white hair and would stride along on high-heeled boots beneath midnight-blue robes. We all had a slight crush on her, despite the fact it was rumoured that she and Dumbledore had been schoolmates. She had been Chief Auror back in the forties, and moved onto the Wizengamot from there.

She declared war. In a signature on a piece of parchment, the Death Eaters went from being a banned organisation to the Enemy. Our battles, which had moved from covert to tacitly supported, were now overt policy.

Her people, the small, trusted few that she had always kept close, scoured through the Ministry, incorruptible and implacable. Wizards and witches in key places suddenly stopped coming to work. When colleagues went to investigate, their houses were found, empty of valuables and with deliveries stopped. Some of the names were genuine shocks, others had long been under suspicion.

The single attacks ended, now it was all concentrated actions. We would face ten, twenty, thirty of them at a time. Lily had her way and rejoined us in her early months. Alice Longbottom had announced her own pregnancy and was still fighting in the thick of it, so James was resigned to watching and guarding ferociously, and he knew that we did, too.

The first months of the year saw two or three attacks a week. The Order worked openly with the Aurors now. Moody had dissolved the line and begun training his staff in our guerrilla tactics. It was just as well, because the Death Eaters had new tricks, too.

Our first experience of them came at an unexpectedly good moment. We had been called to Godric’s Hollow because intelligence said an attack was expected. Bagnold had originally scheduled a skeleton team, but Dumbledore asked for reinforcements, arguing that there were many aged witches and wizards in the area who would need protection.

So there were three dozen of us arrayed on the outskirts of the town when that coldness that I had felt in Horsham descended again.

‘Here we go,’ Remus muttered.

‘It’s him,’ I warned.

‘Ladies and Gentlemen,’ Moody yelled. ‘They’ve brought their chief nasty along tonight. Take a close look. He’s only human. He can die like the rest of us. We are at war, people, no holds barred, no holding back. Before the morning, I’ll be buying everyone here a drink to celebrate our victory!’

He had barely finished the last word when a wall of cold blue flame hit us, sucking the oxygen from the air and engulfing Moody himself. Remus was instantly in action. He swept his wand and shouted a spell that brought a gust of wind and sent the flame back to its source. A scream and flare told us it had hit.

Lily ran to Moody. He was batting out flames on his upper body, but his right leg was a charred mess. ‘Leave me!’ he shouted. ‘Get out there! Get at them! This is our chance!’

We didn’t win that night, but we hurt them. They had three Giants with them, all lay dead by morning. Four Death Eaters had been captured, including Rosier, which I counted as a win. Moody had been as good as his word. He sent a message to the innkeep from St Mungo’s and we drank on his tab over breakfast, Lily telling James they would have to come back when she could actually drink.

‘Apparently,’ Remus told me, ‘he’s secretly pleased since he has plans for a prosthetic leg with cunning features.’

‘I’m not surprised at all,’ I confessed. ‘Where did you learn that wind spell?’

‘I’ve been studying.’

‘But how did you know you’d need it?’

He gave me an odd look. ‘We could need anything before we’re done here. I try to keep my arsenal as broad as possible.’

It made so much sense that I joined him in afternoons over books when we had the time. Not that there was much of that. By the end of February we were run ragged and battered. My foot was constantly aching, Remus had a new and nasty scar down one forearm, Peter had lost both his eyebrows and James had cracked two ribs. Only Lily and Alice had come through the series of battles unharmed, as though being pregnant had made each of them faster and stronger. Perhaps it had, perhaps it had just made them more focussed.

It was the beginning of March before Voldemort appeared again, a Saturday and a full moon. Remus had taken himself off to the country, but insisted I stay behind, we were being called out almost daily now and he didn’t want to take me away from the effort.

Just before sunset James appeared in the Floo. ‘Essex,’ he panted. ‘Ackerley, Moody’s there, called for reinforcements. East side of the town.’

I grabbed my coat, broom and a belt of Giant Sleep vials. A quick Apparation and I was there, not a hundred yards from where the Order members were thronged, nervous and milling. I ran to the left flank, looking about. Peter greeted me.

‘You missed the first wave,’ he told me. ‘James says it was a test. They came in throwing Stunners, then went back. He says they were counting us.’

‘Well, their count’s wrong, then,’ I said, trying to jolly him up. I wasn’t the only one arriving; other familiar figures were moving down the single road leading from the town to the field and wood beyond.

‘I don’t like it,’ he said. ‘I don’t like it at all.’

‘None of us do, Wormtail, none of us do.’

Moody barked a string of orders, and we took up positions, waiting, waiting. A quarter hour passed, a half hour.

‘Maybe they’re gone?’ Peter ventured.

‘No such luck,’ muttered Marlene from further up the line.

She was right. Scarcely five minutes later, they advanced. The twin pounding of the earth told us they had brought two Giants, hidden in the trees, and the flood of winter chill that ran before their onslaught confirmed their leader was with them.

The first hexes flew, and we were engaged. James was in the centre of the line, he and Lily were surrounded by the Prewetts, Moody, Longbottoms and Shacklebolt. I made a vague move towards them, and Moody shouted to hold the line, so I held. When the first Reducto was flung form the cover of the treeline, I screamed ‘Protego’ before the middle syllable was even enunciated.

Near me, Benjy and Marlene were taking full advantage of the lifting of the ban on Unforgiveables. A steady stream of Crucios left them as the enemy strode into view. I envied them the clarity of their anger, even then I hesitated to cross that taboo.

A tall masked figure loomed out of the mist gathering in the twilight and lunged at Peter, with a cry of ‘Sectum…’

I cut off the spell with a Stunner, sending the figure spinning back to the edge of the field. But Peter broke the line with a yelp, running left, away from the perceived threat.

‘Wormtail!’ I screamed after him, to no avail. Before he could return there was another masked figure behind him, moving fast and focussed. I willed him to change shape, but the stupid fool was too panicked to think.

‘Go and bring that little fool back before he gets himself killed,’ Marlene barked. ‘We’ll manage till you get back.’

I left my broom, tossed Benjy the belt and went. Peter had the good sense to run a ragged line so that the hexes thrown behind him missed. But he was running into danger. I Apparated ahead of him and threw an Impedimenta over his shoulder at the chasing figure, who stopped directly.

‘Get back!’ I yelled at Peter.

He looked about in alarm, then saw a clear path back to Marlene. Head down, he ran, and ran fast.

I was a minute too slow in following him, and closer to the woods than I had imagined. I didn’t see the Death Eater stride out towards me, only heard his stern ‘Expelliarmus.’

As my wand flew from my hand, I turned, scared, but with some vague notion that one should face death like a man.

The Death Eater shook his head. ‘I’m not killing you, Sirius,’ he told me, lifting his mask to reveal Lucius’s face.

I actually sighed with relief. ‘Malfoy, thank you.’

‘Don’t thank me yet.’ And he took two swift steps towards me and crushed his fist into the side of my face, sending me to the ground, dazed.

It was only a matter of minutes before my head cleared, but in that time the sounds of the battle had grown distant, I looked up, expecting to see Marlene and Benjy a short run from me. They had fallen back, and were near to the edge of the town. Between us were several masked figures, deep in the fight.

I blinked to find my focus, then sat up, ready to Accio my wand. A low growl sounded in my ears. Years with Remus paid off, I moved only my eyes. The wolf was some ten feet away, perhaps enough for me to grasp my wand and stop it, perhaps not. I wished then that I hadn’t left my broom behind, but considered the odds were still passable. Then another growl sounded, and another. I was left with one choice.

When I changed, they sat back on their haunches and gave quizzical whines. The pack tossed the question among themselves: what was this? Part of their minds was still human and shouted enemy, but the lupine part – the irresistible smell world that overwhelmed the Homo brain with all things Canis – it called dog, and cousin, and harmless.

For a series of pounding heartbeats, I thought they might back down. The battle was loud near us, and there were more werewolves running past to join it. Then a medium-sized wolf, not a leader, but with enough scrap and scar to show ambition, got to his feet and growled deep in his throat, hackles up, ears and lips drawn back.

I tensed to run. If Peter, James or Lily saw me there was still a chance they would be able to shield me back to the line. It was better than the alternative at any rate.

And then a scent so familiar filled my world, the taste that I woke and slept to, and I relaxed.

He barrelled into me, a ball of snarling fury. Though his teeth didn’t break my skin, the sheer weight and speed of him sent me flying head over tail, whimpering as I fell. He was on top of me before I could roll back to my feet, and put his mouth around my throat; again, teeth just above the skin. I whimpered submission, and wagged my tail feebly in appeasement.

He moved his maw back and snorted down long nose and fangs above my face. One paw held my ribs down, my paws came up in begging supplication. He raised his muzzle and howled, and the rest of the pack watched him closely.

Stepping from my chest he allowed me to roll over, then positioned himself behind me, and it suddenly occurred to me that I had no idea if biting was the only way of transmitting his curse. But what I had thought was positioning for a rut was not; he dropped himself on top of me, flooding my scent with his. Mine, it said.

And he was larger than any of them.

They slunk away, their lopes radiating boredom rather than the fear that underlay their scents. Only when they had all moved off to join the battle did he shift. He stepped away from me, then looked back over his shoulder, the command to follow clear.

I whined, and he gave me a moment to search the grass nearby. With my wand in my mouth, I followed him, into the woods, away from the pack, away from our friends.

The Potters and the Longbottoms were heroes that night. With Moody directing, the four of them gathered our forces into a defensible square, and they proceeded to mete out rack, violence and bloody retribution for every life of ours that had been lost.

Lily told me that Bellatrix called the retreat, and I kicked myself for missing it. But she and James were simply grateful that I was alive. Marlene had seen me fall, though Benjy had seen the big black dog leave with one of the werewolves, so they had hoped.

Remus talked very little that next morning, aside from to reassure Peter it wasn’t his fault. A half-dozen wolf-corpses had littered the field at dawn, some of them people he knew, who in their natural form would have fled the scene, but who in the hunt had lost themselves and been led to a fight that wasn’t theirs.

Much later in the day he shook his head at me. ‘You were stupid,’ he said. ‘What if I’d bitten you?’

‘Then it would be something else we shared,’ I shrugged, caring only that we were both there and alive.

His look was as cold as the mist that had crept through the night. ‘Never say that again.’

........................................

Lily finally agreed to go out with James, just the once. It was sixth year, and she was about to turn down yet another of his invitations to Hogsmeade when she suddenly said yes. On the proviso he find a date for her friend, Mary.

Remus and I took one look at his face and fled the common room. When he and Peter came back upstairs some time later, James’s eyes were dancing, and even Peter looked cheery.

‘We have dates,’ James announced. ‘I recognise that you two are immune to the wiles of women, but Peter and I will be walking beside goddesses this Saturday.’

‘Evans said yes, and she has a friend!’ Peter summed up far more succinctly.

‘Good for you, Wormtail,’ Remus encouraged. ‘Show Mr Smooth here what a real date’s like, yours will probably still be talking to you at the end of the day.’

Peter grinned, then scuttled over and asked Remus for tips.

Saturday saw James and Peter dressed to kill, with Remus and me in our usual combination of school and Muggle attire – mostly worn to annoy McGonners, but also because we knew we looked good in tight trousers.

We met up with Lily and Mary in the common room. Lily was wearing a flowered smock that effectively hid her figure, but Mary had popped on a spot of lipstick. Peter was awed. I was about to tease him, but Remus stopped me.

‘Look at them,’ he said, quietly. ‘They’re happy.’

And they were. James was quiet and attentive, Peter told his best stories, the girls laughed all the way to the village. It was a lovely day. Remus and I slipped away halfway through the afternoon, but we caught up the others on the way back to the castle. We weren’t the only ones.

‘Pettigrew? Macdonald is dating Pettigrew?’ Mulciber’s voice could be heard a hundred yards away. ‘Why?’

‘She’s probably doing it for a bet,’ drawled one of the other Slytherin seventh years.

‘One she lost,’ Mulciber brayed.

‘Ignore them,’ Mary muttered through a tight jaw. ‘Let’s just keep going.’

Mulciber blew a kiss. ‘Come on Macdonald, you were better off with me than with that little runt.’

Mary shuddered.

‘What is it?’ Remus asked, noticing.

‘I had a run-in with him at the beginning of last year,’ she said, quietly.

‘He Imperiused her,’ Lily fumed.

The four us of stopped in our tracks, shocked.

Mary was flustered. ‘That’s what Lily thinks, maybe it was just hypnotism, or a potion, but he had me following him about and … doing things …’

She caught the expression of horror in James’s eyes, and blushed deeply. ‘Not as bad as it could have been, more taking my blouse off while he watched.’

‘That’s bad enough,’ Lily muttered. ‘If I hadn’t come by …’

Mary smiled at her. ‘But you did. That’s what matters, isn’t it?’

‘Evans is a good one to have in your corner,’ James agreed.

‘Are you sure you don’t want me to hex him?’ I offered. ‘It’d be no trouble at all.’

‘You should report him,’ James advised. ‘That’s an Unforgivable. Even at school, they’re not allowed.’

‘That’s what I said,’ Lily agreed.

‘Quite right,’ said James, without any thought for ingratiating himself, which, of course, meant that he did.

‘I’ll show him!’ Peter vowed.

‘Please,’ Mary said. ‘Just leave it.’

But he had already stormed over the small distance towards the two tormentors. They were both taller and older than him, but he more than made up for any disadvantage with righteous indignation.

‘You think you’re so tough, but you’re just bullies,’ he told them.

‘This from one of Black’s bumboys? That’s rich,’ Mulciber sneered.

‘You won’t see us picking on anyone who didn’t start it, and never a girl.’

‘Only because none of you are the least bit interested in girls.’

Peter drew himself up to his full five-foot-five. ‘Well, that’s why I have a date and you don’t, I suppose?’

‘Shame your date’s gone off with Potter.’

It was true, Mary and Lily were hurrying up towards the school gates with James. She’d missed all of Peter’s bravery.

Mulciber and his friend laughed loudly. ‘You should have been in Slytherin, Pettigrew. We’d never steal your girl,’ the seventh-year told him.

‘We’d get you a girl, which is more than your face will ever manage,’ Mulciber added cruelly.

‘Ignore him,’ Remus advised, steering Peter after the others. ‘You did very well.’

‘Fat lot of good it, no Mary to be impressed.’

‘I was impressed,’ Remus assured him.

‘No offence, Moony, but I really don’t want to snog you.’

‘None taken, but I will report your gallantry to the lady in question, with suitable embellishments.’

‘Cheers, you’re a mate.’

‘And don’t listen to him about your face,’ I added. ‘Mary wears glasses in class, I’d bet she only sees a blur.’

Finely honed Quidditch skills saw me evade Remus’s punch to the arm, but I did feel a little bad for saying it. It was hardly Peter’s fault the rest of us were so very young and beautiful.

........................................

The debriefing after Ackerley went on for days. James was convinced it had been a turning point, Moody was not so certain.

‘The whole thing could have been feeling us out, we used most of our best tactics, they’ve seen our arsenal of new spellwork and potions. I agree that most of them were there that night, but not all. And – if you were Him – why would you sacrifice some of your best witches and wizards then retreat? You’d pull them out sooner, or you’d fight through to the end.’

None of us had more field experience than him, not even Dumbledore, and the mood of victory quickly turned to one of apprehension. They didn’t make us wait long. At four o’clock in the afternoon on the twelfth, Minister Millicent Bagnold’s voice interrupted the wireless broadcast. Aurors had spotted a massive force assembling near Tinworth. Wizarding Britain was under attack. Giants and Imperiused Muggles were among the army. All Aurors were called in for duty, and any witches and wizards in or near Cornwall were advised to pack their belongings and prepare to evacuate.

‘Gather together in small numbers in places you can defend. Reinforce your wards. The Muggle-born are encouraged to consider heading abroad for the duration; France, Germany, Italy and Spain have all agreed to suspend travel document requirements for the duration. Sweden, Norway, Denmark, Holland and Finland have offered refuge in Auror-protected sites for those who lack the funds to travel of their own accord. The British Wizarding Government thanks our allies for their support in our time of need.

‘The Ministry calls on all to be prepared and to work for each other’s safety during this time of uncertainty. We have multiple lines of defence in place, but we face an enemy more ruthless, more vile, than any to threaten these shores in the history of our island. If each of us keeps our head, and gives aid to those who need it, we will survive this crisis strong and sure, though it may take time to secure the victory.

‘But I say this with certainty: we will not fall. No matter what the outcome of this battle, no matter what happens to any individual, myself included, that which makes Wizarding Britain mighty and great will remain, and we will triumph at the last.’

‘So, we’re probably doomed,’ I muttered to Remus as I switched the wireless off.

‘Good speech, though,’ he replied.

‘Yes, quite. Tinworth?’

‘Tinworth.’

Moody had been right. They had been feeling us out, and now they had our measure. We assembled a few miles from their forces, and looked for a patch of ground that would give us a good chance. There were precious few, they had chosen their location well. If we moved to high ground, we would be too near the cliffs, if we looked for a choke point, too close to the road to Hellesveor and St Ives. It was the open land outside Tinworth or the village itself, but there were still families unevacuated there. We took to the fields, though we stayed close to the town, ready to run for its cover.

‘Watch your feet!’ Edgar shouted to all of us. ‘Before you take a position, check that you have enough defensible ground around you. Look out for gravel and trip hazards. Stay close, we’ll fall back to the town when it’s empty. Make use of the hedges, the walls and the trees. We have perhaps twenty minutes, use them to make cover.’

At fifteen minutes, Moody took control. ‘Those with brooms, make sure you’re loaded with Giant Sleep. In the air as soon as you can. Aurors take the front line. Everyone else behind. Oblivators to the rear, we’ll end up with Muggle casualties the way this looks to be going. Our intelligence says we outnumber them two-to-one, but that means nothing with this lot.’

Lily and James arrived just as he started outlining his plan. Evans shrugged a brief apology. ‘The whole morning in morning sickness is just a lie,’ she said.

‘You’re with Peter, Alice and Frank, yes?’ James checked.

‘Yes,’ she assured him. ‘And you try not to fall off your broom.’

‘It’s my one skill,’ he replied with a kiss.

I held Remus’s hand tightly, at least we were usually beside each other in a battle.

‘Movement!’ came a cry.

Remus, James and I were poised to kick off from the ground when Moody’s voice cut through the air. ‘Stay on the ground. Their Giants are in reserve, they’ve sent in Muggles.’

And it was true. As the enemy strode into view they were not masked and robed figures, but dressed in Muggle clothing, carrying clubs, sticks, knives. And most of them were children.

James swore bitterly beside me.

‘He’s emptied one of the schools,’ Remus realised.

‘They’re in there!’ James said, shocked. He was right, amid the figures dressed in maroon and blue uniforms and the adults in their jeans and anoraks, the occasional figure in robes and a mask was visible.

‘Moody!’ James shouted to relay his discover, but Moody had already seen.

‘Aim carefully!’ he ordered.

‘No,’ said Remus beside me.

I turned sharply to him, he was staring out and shaking his head.

‘Stun them all. They have weapons.’

And of course he was right.

With shouts of Stupefy we knocked down the first row of children. James shouted at us to stop. ‘They’ll hurt themselves falling down!’

‘Better than being dead,’ I replied.

It took only a moment for the others to realise our strategy and follow it. The Death Eaters broke from the ranks and fled, and soon the field was littered with the unconscious bodies of several hundred Muggles.

Aurors ran out and cleared them, Apparating two at a time back into the town. I could see why Moody ordered it, because the battle would have been fought on top of them, but it put fifty of our side at risk and out of the defence for ten minutes. Dumbledore would never have forgiven us if we’d left them, though. His man, Rubeus Hagrid, was there, too. He collected six Muggles at a time, physically lugging them back behind the town’s cover.

They sent the giants in before the job was finished.

‘In the air! Hold them back!’ Moody shouted, and some of us were already up. We flew in coordinated sets, two to distract, one to throw the potion in their faces. For all that Giant Sleep was an uncannily good potion, it needed a direct hit. There were more giants than I had ever seen before, it looked like dozens, though it could have been only twenty or so.

One by one they dropped, our people ran out from the line to make sure they fell back, away from the Aurors and Hagrid collecting the Muggles. Though once the field was clear, we let them fall wherever, they would give us some degree of cover at least. Fabian’s broom was sent careening by the smack of a club, but he landed safely. I was amazed to see that we had nearly finished the job without a single casualty on our side, though I knew that these were just diversionary tactics, designed to tire and occupy us.

And then I heard Benjy Fenwick scream. He was above me and to the right, and had just delivered a successful attack on the last giant. It was falling, senseless, to the ground, but he was spinning wildly away, clutching his side, even though I couldn’t see how he’d been hit.

Remus was there beside him, grabbing him from the falling broom and hauling him onto his. I flew up beside to help steady them both.

‘Is he all right?’ Remus asked, but I couldn’t see.

Then Moody’s amplified voice rang out over everything. ‘Fall back! Fall back!’

We came into land ahead of the others running back to the town wall. It marked our point of assembly, more open than the field, but with reinforcements streaming down the streets.

‘What is it? Why are we running?’ A half-dozen voices questioned Moody.

‘There’s something in the air, and it’s not brooms,’ he shouted to everyone. ‘Stay alert! Constant vigilance!’

And that was the moment that I grew afraid, because Moody was panicked. He was afraid. As I looked from face to face I saw it catching, though James frowned against it and Remus lifted his nose to the air, tasting the wind for a change.

And then the cold came again and we all felt the change he could sense. I looked out, expecting to see Him striding across the field, parting the mists, as he had the last time, but there was no sign.

I glanced at Remus. He had stopped sniffing with his face tilted up, and it remained there, frozen, horrified. I followed his eyes and saw what he did: a long streaming figure flying without a broom, robes raven, face pale and bleak and beautiful, shining down on us like an agent of destruction.

I saw, in that moment, how Bella and the others had mistaken their reaction to him for love; amid the horror there was awe. He was so close now that the breath chilled in my lungs. Even Remus and James – always the first into the fray – moved slowly to raise their wands, mouth their spells.

I looked to Remus, wanting to fix his face in my mind at the end, which was how I came to see that Moody had fooled us all. Dumbledore was there, striding through the town gate, standing tall, raising his wand and shouting a ringing, ‘Incendio!’

A powerful umbrella of flame rose above us, throwing back the cold and sending Voldemort burning and screaming into the distance.

Chaos followed, as half of his force broke forwards seeking revenge, but it was a mob, they fought with emotion but without order. The others fled in fear, or looked for their leader. Bella’s screams of anguish rang out even over the sounds of battle

It took hours, not until after midnight could we really say that we had won. And then, we realised. We had really won. This had been their do-or-die moment, and many of them had died. Others were on their way to Azkaban. We had lost four all-up, it was a victory of Shakespearean proportion.

James and Lily found us sitting against the wall, Remus almost asleep on my shoulder.

‘You two reprobates still alive?’ Lily asked, hugging me gently.

‘Couldn’t leave your sprog without moral guidance,’ I told her.

She leaned on my other shoulder, and James leant against her.

‘How are the others?’ I asked.

‘Peter sprained his ankle,’ Lily recounted. ‘Frank and Alice are fine, except that she’s in trouble for ending up on the front line. Or at least, she would be if she hadn’t saved his life by doing so. I suspect it’s just an excuse for make-up sex.’

‘Who has the energy?’ Remus groaned from my lapel.

Lily laughed, and reached out to pat his hand.

‘Is it really over?’ James wondered, looking out at the bodies that littered the ground before us.

I looked with him. ‘I think it is,’ I told him.

The Minister appeared then. She had brought fresh Healers, and food and drink, and more Obliviators to help with the Imperiused Muggles. We joined the crowd around her and ate and drank mechanically, too tired to even enjoy the repast. I was onto my second venison pie when Remus stormed away from my side. I took it with me as I chased after him.

‘Stop it!’ he yelled at Emmeline Vance, who was standing over a giant.

‘Sorry, Lupin, Ministerial orders.’

‘The war is done now, he’s defeated. We can repatriate them to wherever they came from.’

Vance shook her head. ‘Too risky. They were happy to rise up against us once, what if they choose to again?’

And with that, she killed the giant.

Remus looked away, sickened. I took his hand, and Apparated us home.

He glared at me. ‘I’m going back. I’m going to stop them.’

‘You can’t, Remus,’ I told him. ‘It’s policy. By the time you change it, it’ll be too late anyway.’

He took a deep breath. ‘Well, then you tell me where we’re better than them. Because right now I can’t see it.’

How do you reply to that? I couldn’t. I made him sandwiches instead. Because at least there was nothing shameful about sandwiches.

.........................................

In my mind, at school, most of us stood on clear sides of the Voldemort question. But in reality most of our fellow students were just studying for their NEWTs and wondering if they’d ever have sex. Remus and I were entirely fortunate that the Hogwarts founders had only ever worried about heterosexual encounters when they set up the Castle’s charms.

I joked with him once, about how we’d benefitted from their naiveté. He shook his head and told me I was looking at it the wrong way.

‘Did you never hear the stories about why Queen Victoria made no bans on lesbians? She wanted to keep her own Ladies of the Bedchamber happy. I think we’re looking at a similar situation. To my mind, Salazar and Godric had quite the thing going and didn’t see why like-minded students should be thwarted.’

‘That,’ I said, ‘is disgusting. And besmirches the fine name of our beloved Gryffindor.’

‘But you’re thinking about it now, aren’t you?’

‘Stop it! Godric would no sooner shag Slytherin than I’d shag Snivellus.’

Remus clutched his hand across his eyes. ‘I am bleaching my brain to remove that mental image, I’ll have you know.’

‘You’re the one who’s always saying I should be nicer to him.’

‘Not that nice!’

‘And he’s very lonely since Evans took up with Prongs.’

‘You can stop now, I promise to never speak of the Founders’ sex lives again.’

‘See that you don’t.’

Of course, it meant that the next time we saw Snivellus, both of us burst out giggling.

He looked down his considerable nose as much as he could for someone who was our height. ‘I expect this from Black, but you usually have more dignity, Lupin.’

‘You’re not going to believe this, but it’s not you,’ Remus offered by way of explanation.

‘Yes, well, you were right about me not believing.’ Snivellus swanned off down the corridor in an almighty huff, which of course had us sliding down the wall with tears of laughter pouring down our faces.

We only stopped at a particularly Scottish cough of disapproval. McGonners was looking down at us, her lips pursed.

‘Was that necessary?’ she asked.

‘We really weren’t giving him grief this time, Professor,’ Remus protested.

‘As opposed to the dozens of other times.’

‘He started it,’ I muttered.

‘Oh, I doubt that, Mr Black. I may take issue with much about Mr Snape, but he is not one to start trouble.’

‘Just finish it’ I muttered.

She looked down at me with disappointment. ‘Are you both seventeen yet? Near enough at any rate. Surely neither of you is stupid enough to believe that this is still a game? Mr Snape is a talented, competent wizard. Do you realise what an asset he would have been if you foolish boys had thought to not torment him mercilessly since first year?’

‘He’s just a Slytherin,’ I grumbled.

‘They’re all just Slytherins,’ she bit out. ‘And the odd Ravenclaw and even the occasional Hufflepuff, and then they leave here and they decide that the world would be better if we had power and do whatever will gain them that power. Surely it would be better if we produced students who believed that the world would be improved if we had compassion and tolerance?’

I assumed that she’d been into her whisky stash, but Remus looked at her seriously. ‘But how would any of us learn that?’ he asked. ‘Everything’s a competition here. And outside of here, everything is at war.’

‘Yes, Mr Lupin, my generation has failed yours fairly comprehensively.’

He smiled at her, and she melted a little. ‘It’s not true. I’d be happy to grow up to be something like you.’

She shook her head, with her lips pursed to keep herself from smiling. ‘No house points for outrageous flattery, Mr Lupin. But I thank you, nonetheless.’

We watched her walk away, and I turned to Remus to make a joke, but was stopped by the look on his face.

‘She’s right. So much of this is about stupid rivalries that should have been stopped before we were old enough for school. Instead we let them fester and then re-badged them as politics.’

I disagreed. ‘You can say that because your parents were fair and reasonable people. But if you’d grown up in my house, you’d know how sincerely some of us believe that we should be in charge and Muggles should be there to do our bidding.’

‘Some of you, I’ll grant. But that’s not everyone. You and I both know people who follow You-Know-Who because their friends do.’

‘No,’ I shook my head. ‘Reggie would probably have gone that way regardless. Mother always had him in her hand.’

‘What about Snape? He’s half-Muggle, he has every reason to be on our side, not theirs.’

I snorted. ‘He’s an oily lackey who’ll follow anyone who tosses him a biscuit.’

‘And your brother follows him. Interesting.’

I looked away at that. I wanted to argue, but he was right.

‘I think,’ I began tentatively, with my head down, ‘I think that I should have made more of an effort with Reggie. Because aside from having the most idiotic political beliefs known to Wizarding kind, he’s all right. I think I let myself get distracted, and by the time I paid attention, it was too late.’

He brushed my hair back from my eyes, and looked into them, searchingly. ‘But you’d forgive him, wouldn’t you? If Regulus came back and said he’d been wrong, you’d take him back, wouldn’t you?’

‘In an instant,’ I’d promised. And it took me years to work out that my clever Moony hadn’t meant Regulus at all.

..............................................

We honestly thought it was over after Tinworth. The attacks stopped, the Ministry had no sudden disappearances to report, and there was a distinct lack of unexplained dead.

‘Bagnold, Aurors, Dumbledore and Plucky Civilians Defeat Death Eaters!’ screamed The Daily Prophet, with twelve pages dissecting the battle and wondering whether You-Know-Who was dead or simply in hiding.

I was certain he was still alive; Bella’s cries had died down at some point during the battle and she had disappeared. She would have turned on us in all her mad fury had she found a corpse.

But as the days stretched into months, we relaxed. Remus took to smiling again. Alice had her boy, Neville, and Lily and James had a son. They called him Harry.

‘Works for everyone, from princes to Knight Bus drivers,’ James told us proudly.

‘Princes?’ Peter asked.

‘We few, we happy few! Though let’s hope he never finds himself at an Agincourt.’

Lily shushed him. ‘None of that, it’s over. He’s going to be a happy baby, and have a lovely life.’

She had her wish, he was the happiest baby there ever was. James and I spoiled him rotten, and so did Remus, even as he took me to task. I bought the sidecar for the bike in preparation for taking him on trips, which put Lily into a right strop, until she came for a ride, at which point she admitted that it might be all right, when he was considerably larger.

Dumbledore came to visit her and Alice, checking they were well, clucking with amusement at the timing of the babies. ‘Within hours. I suppose we know what you were all doing to relax during the war.’

And I had to try very hard to forget that he’d said that.

The Ministry was grateful to us, at least, most of us. James and I fended off approaches from the Department of Magical Law Enforcement, Peter accepted one with Sports. Only Remus was told that his particular skills ‘did not fit the profile of the Ministry at this time’.

‘Bugger that,’ he decided, and began a campaign for the rights of other Magical Creatures. I took some delight in knowing Black money was funding it.

In the weeks before Christmas we were all nervous. People would only gather in small groups, convinced that the holiday would see a resumption of attacks. Nothing. Silent nights.

Remus wouldn’t tell me what he was getting me for Christmas, while I did my usual trick of pointing out everything I thought he might like and trying to guess what he liked the most.

‘Cufflinks,’ I suggested.

‘No need.’

‘New broom!’

‘Old one’s fine.’

‘Robe clasp.’

‘You bought me one the year before last. It’s my favourite, I wear it all the time.’

‘But there’s a stone missing.’

He ruffled my hair. ‘Just because something's broken doesn't mean I stop loving it.’

‘You’re a beautiful person, Remus.’

He didn’t dignify that with a reply, just sat on me and tickled me until I couldn’t breathe, as was right and proper.

We were at James and Lily’s beck and call. Peter was around there most days, little Harry seemed to hold his projectile vomiting moments until he was being held by Uncle Wormtail. I could always make the baby laugh, Remus could always calm him to sleep. Lily joked that every visit should start with me putting Harry in a good mood and end with Moony putting him to bed.

It was such a remarkable thing, that these two people, who we loved, had made another person. And if James and Lily were both a little distant now, we understood why. I asked Remus if we should buy a cat, he ignored me.

The Order met once a month now, exchanged news, caught up on events, laughed as the ever-growing collection of babies pulled faces at each other. The older Weasley boys were left in charge of the little ones, which nearly resulted in disaster on several occasions. The Prewetts were enthusiastic, but irresponsible uncles. Remus and I prided ourselves on the fact we were doing so much better with Harry. Though James occasionally let the team down, Lily nearly strangled him when she found him racing Harry against little Neville and the youngest Weasley.

By the time the July meeting rolled around, Marlene voiced what we had all been thinking.

‘Should we wind things up?’

‘Dissolve the Order?’ Fabian snorted. ‘Sacrilege! Who will defend the weak, guard the Muggles?’

‘Provide us with free lunches and somewhere to catch up with all our friends on Sundays?’ Gideon finished for him.

‘We can still meet up, just without the need for endless discussions on evil,’ Dorcas told them, laughing.

‘Speak for yourselves,’ muttered Moody. ‘I can’t get free of you lot fast enough.’

‘You love us really,’ Fabian told him, cuddling close until Moody swatted him.

Somebody thought it would be a good idea to commemorate the moment with a photograph. You should have seen it, we were all so happy, so certain that this was our promised tomorrow.

Three days later Benjy Fenwick’s body was found.

That day had started beautifully, I rolled out of bed around eleven when Remus woke me, returning from yet another of his meetings. We were meeting up with Lily to take her shopping while James minded Harry. She described this as bonding, but in fact I suspect we were there more for lugging.

At lunch she Flooed to say that Dumbledore had sent word that he was coming, something urgent, she should stay home. Remus and I headed out regardless, I think he had plans for ice-cream.

We were on Diagon Alley when the peace broke. And as I tell you what happened, you’ll think it took an age, but in fact it was all over in an instant. Remus had stopped to look at new books, and I was looking at him. Something clattered behind us, and after years of the Order, we both automatically moved to the cover at the side of the building.

The clatter was nothing more than a child dropping a toy, but in the glass of Fortescue’s opposite, I could see reflected Travers and Rosier, carrying sacks that seemed to be dripping something dark. I moved to apprehend them, at the same time as I saw Snape, looking sick and broken, looking straight at us and mouthing ‘Go.’

Before my wand could clear my pocket, Remus had Apparated us home.

‘We have to go back!’

He shook his head. ‘It’s not safe.’

‘It’s not safe for the people back there!’

‘Of course it is. They want to seduce or frighten them, not kill. Not one of their attacks was on a town that wasn’t riddled with anti-Voldemort Ministry or Order members.’

‘There’s only three of them, we can capture them all!’

‘We only saw three.’

‘Why the hell was Snivellus warning you?’

He pushed his hair back from eyes that were suddenly exhausted. ‘I thought he was warning you. For Reggie’s sake. Come on, we need to let Dumbledore and Moody know.’

We found Moody first, by the time we reached Dumbledore, he already knew. Benjy’s head, right arm and part of his left leg had been dumped in the middle of the street, the Dark Mark set above. Shops had shut and everyone who could had fled before the Aurors even arrived. According to Kingsley, Benjy had been dead for at least a day.

We gave our report three times: to Moody, then Dumbledore – who told us he wasn’t surprised, and that Mr Snape had recently changed his views on the issue of You-Know-Who. The third time was to James and Lily, at their new house, hidden in the quiet of Godric’s Hollow.

‘He was meant to bring me here for a beer,’ Lily groused. ‘Not to hide out.’

‘You could sneak out under James’s cloak,’ Remus suggested. ‘I’m sure the barkeep has had stranger things than invisible requests for alcohol in that pub.’

James pulled a face. ‘Can’t, Dumbledore borrowed it.’

‘The liberty! He can just unborrow it, can’t have you cooped up in here all the time!’

‘My thoughts exactly,’ James agreed. ‘Still, with you two visiting, it’s not so bad. Lils has a theory regarding this Snivellus business, you know.’

‘Severus,’ Lily corrected firmly. ‘I think he’s the one who let Dumbledore know that we were at risk, and that Voldemort was still alive. He may be an idiot, but he was a decent boy when I knew him, and we were good friends. I’d probably do the same if our places were reversed.’

‘Which they never would be,’ James said quickly.

‘Ahhhh-guh!’ Harry agreed from his position on Remus’s shoulder.

‘Explains why he warned us,’ Remus mused. ‘Would look bad to let two of your best friends die just after he’s done something decent for you.’

‘Yeah …’ I replied. Then looked back to James’s bored face. ‘So, special target? You are such an overachiever.’

‘Not even Voldemort can resist my charms,’ he agreed.

‘Don’t say his name!’ Lily protested.

‘It’s just a name,’ James said, surprised.

‘It’s a name I don’t want Harry learning,’ she said, and we all understood.

James and Lily guessed they would be in hiding for a few days, maybe a couple of weeks. It was nearly four months in the end, and we were glad they were out of it.

The McKinnons were the next to go. They didn’t even have a chance to call for help. Marlene, her husband, Paul, their three children and his mother – all cold and still and frozen in their despair. Frank found them. He stopped in when they didn’t answer their Floo. After the Aurors arrived, he went home and packed Alice and Neville up and moved them to his mother’s, where the wards were strong and the defences vicious.

It was straight back to the worst days of the war, except that this time we were being targetted more intently than we had ever been before.

When we crawled into bed just before dawn after a night patrolling – when we had meant to be at Harry’s first birthday – Remus pressed himself against me chastely, seeking warmth despite the summer air.

‘I think they’re looking for something,’ he told me.

‘Someone,’ I guessed.

He pressed his face into my collarbone. ‘I’ll keep you from them,’ he vowed.

....................................

I only once asked Remus what it was like. We were nearly done with school, and the afternoons had turned from frantic revision to idleness. We told each other things, things that couples shared, because this thing between us had been more than two schoolboys finding release and we had slowly admitted it.

So he heard the stories of my mother, and Sirius Who Could Have Been Such A Good Boy But Chose To Disappoint. And I confessed to him that I actually did think they were right on one thing and that Muggles were stupid and dangerous with their stupidity, but even allowing for that, I thought they ought to be protected from our kind. And he told me about the kindness of his parents and the sadness of having only them, and then not them.

‘But you found us before they went,’ I reminded him. And he agreed that had made the difference.

And after we had talked about everything else, when the only things left to learn were incidental or embarrassing, I could no longer stop myself from asking.

He shook his head. ‘I can’t tell you.’

‘Of course you can. If you can tell anyone, you can tell me. I’m a dog in my other life, we’re related.’

He laughed, but did not allow that I might be right. ‘You might understand about the world of scent and the primacy of what is happening at the very instant of now, but dogs are half-human. I could never explain the pack to you.’

‘Try.’

‘You won’t like it. I don’t.’

‘It doesn’t matter. It’s part of you, but it’s not all of you. You don’t like my slovenliness.’

‘Hardly the same degree of flaw.’

‘No, my mess irritates you daily.’

‘Idiot.’ He sighed, and I knew I had won.

‘It’s a yearning,’ he said, slowly. ‘Even though I’ve spent almost every full moon alone or with you three, since I was turned, at each one I crave the company of those like me. To join in their howls and be a part of the intimacy of shared language, shared intent. To run with them, become something more by giving my individuality to the whole. Every time that I have met another werewolf, some small part of me cries to stay with them. Even if I know they’re killers rather than victims. Even if it’s Greyback.’

‘Merlin,’ I breathed.

‘I told you you wouldn’t like it.’

‘That’s horrible.’

‘I know.’ He gave me a weak smile. ‘I manage to resist. You, Prongs and Wormtail are sufficiently distracting.’

‘Me most of all, I should hope.’

‘Absolutely. You most of all.’

I held onto him, and told him, ‘Good, because I wouldn’t let you go.’

‘Dearest Sirius,’ he whispered, smiling as he kissed me. ‘I’m not entirely certain you could stop me.’

Part IV