On the tenth day of Christmas, blamebrampton gave to me ...

[blamebrampton]

A limerick. Oh shut up.

There was a young writer of fic
Who could not master writing 'bout dick
She had character, plot,
But of sex not a jot,
And her readers said 'Bugger this for a load of old cobblers, I'm off to find some porn'

In happier news the notes to flisters F-H are actually up here, and for those with user names C-E are here and A-B are here. While I still hold that this was a good idea, it takes MUCH LONGER than I thought it would, and I have really really sore arms at the moment. This is because I have been rearranging the house and putting up new shelves, which led to a bit of stiffness, so I went to see the sadistic Chinese Massage Man, which means I am now still stiff and also bruised. I should point out that the second part of that was not intentional on my part.

Also, if I forget anyone, it's NOT PERSONAL, it's INCOMPETENCE, which I abound in. One person defriended me and I had a momentary panic it was because I had accidentally said something horrid, when I realised that I had actually omitted her! I'm trying to work out if I should say anything ...

Comments

[marguerite-26.livejournal.com]

my vote - which you didn't ask for - is to say something. It might be awkward, but probably worth it.

Hee!Limerick! I prefer to read the young writer's fics and THEN go find porn. The best of both worlds. ;)

[blamebrampton.livejournal.com]

Ooh, you are too kind!

It's a hard one because she has no entries in her lj and I'll probably just have to wait until she comments on a fic of mine (if she ever does). Or maybe I could send her a PM apologising and saying that if she defriended me just because the endless wait for porn was exhausting, that's fine, if it was because she thought I was mean, no I'm just stupid!

[pingrid.livejournal.com]

Well, you do write the word "cock" now and again, and since we all know what they look like and what they can do we can imagine the sex. That, or go off and read or write some porn after. ;)

The defriending - I'm thinking if it makes you feel bad then say something. If it was someone you don't deal with a lot and aren't that fussed about, leave it - but go back and add them to your list, so if they fume at their friends that you're a bitch for leaving them out there'll be no proof! ;)

[blamebrampton.livejournal.com]

I cannot believe that you did not want to go and light candles at Machiavelli's tomb! That's pure evil and genius ;-)

I do actually have two sex scenes in stories, but one's just a handjob and they are the two stories that no one reads. Oh, hang on, three, but the third is het, so, yeah. Maybe I should write something utterly filthy but have it be Made Eye Moody/Bill Weasley ...

[annafugazzi.livejournal.com]

And her readers said 'Bugger this for a load of old cobblers, I'm off to find some porn'
LOL!!!

Nice :D :D :D

[blamebrampton.livejournal.com]

I feel as though I should end most stories with links to something by Cal or Pir8 as a public service ...

[libby-drew.livejournal.com]

Love the limerick.

Try saying penis a lot. It works for me. Or just...don't. Your works of brilliance need no dick.

[blamebrampton.livejournal.com]

I think I might embroider that last sentence on a scatter cushion for my sofa ;-)

[potterotic.livejournal.com]

A lovely young girl with a pen
Writes tales about beautiful men
All her stories have wit
And the boys are quite fit
But the Pope has more sex, dear. Amen.

[pingrid.livejournal.com]

Hahah, that's perfect! :D

[blamebrampton.livejournal.com]

You are full of win, and verily awesome!

Though to be strictly fair, I have three stories that involve sex on page. One is het and the other two no one really read, and it is mostly just hands on cocks, but they do exist!

[calanthe-fics.livejournal.com]

*snerk* Do tell us who defriended you. Unless it was Hapendfro, who has deleted her journal.

[blamebrampton.livejournal.com]

It was a sweet young reader who is all new and has nothing in her lj and I will now have to either ignore her and pretend I didn't feel badly about the whole thing, or stalk her and make her feel oppressed! I might just hope she comments on my fest fic so I can say something low-key and apologetic in my reply!

[beatnikspinster.livejournal.com]

Hahaha! Your work is wonderful without the porn. Write what you want. :)

[blamebrampton.livejournal.com]

Grazie mille, you overly kind woman!

Alas, my Autobiography of Cornelius Fudge would see the loyalest parts of my flist desert me ... ;-)

[uminohikari.livejournal.com]

XD You should just say something, even if it'll be awkward!

..HAH, but I don't read porn! So this is a lovely place to stay~

[blamebrampton.livejournal.com]

It's a bit hard because I would have to PM her out of the blue, and she may have just decided she can't be arsed reading all of my blather. I'll think on it ;-)

And yay for minimal porn people!

[drgaellon]

Pffft... you are undertaking a massive effort out of the kindness of your heart. Anyone who EXPECTS to be recognized needs to STFU and get over it.

[blamebrampton.livejournal.com]

Oh dear doctor, it's a Young Person, and they are gentle and prone to stings and arrows. At least, that's what they tell me. I spent my youth stomping about in boots and saying 'I'm not frightened by a ton of horse, what makes you think you can upset me?'

I do recommend a life involving the countryside to the young folk I know ...

[bryoneybrynn.livejournal.com]

I'm in the message the person if you care, leave it if you don't. *shrugs* And hee! I adore your writing as is but I can't say I'd be against a bit of the c-o-c-k entering the picture now and again. But don't strain yourself or anything. There's lots of others who can provide us with our pervy thrills but there aren't many who tell a story half as well as you do. :)

[blamebrampton.livejournal.com]

There is some cock in the R/S no one read. I've taken this as negative reinforcement and will never go there again ;-) (Well, except in reality of course. Oh, that's a bit TMI ...)

[meredyth-13.livejournal.com]

You make me laugh, honey!

*sends liniment and arnica*

*hugs*

[blamebrampton.livejournal.com]

It's SO not fair, James had the Chinese Massage Man of Goodness and Gentleness. I had the one who is practicing to open his own dungeon!

[frantic-mice.livejournal.com]

o.O

Umm. I dunno. I think ur fics are PLENTY sexy. There's no actual sex (WHO CARES?!?!?! NOT I!) but there's plenty of tension, and grownupedness and that's sexay. I mean. Part of being an adult, for many peeps, is that sexual bit. The sexual element is part of the interactions btw Harry and Draco so somtiems to me? The sexy parts seem redundant. Not to mention that MANYMANY sex scenes make me laugh aloud which I admit is not rly the properest reaction but there u go. Not my fault if somtiems the writers have Draco with one leg this way and the other leg the other way and the back on the front and the front on the back and me being a CRAZY Micie try to actually u know act out what's going on and then have to wonder if MAGICAL peeps are liek super extra bendy. And I'm pretty bendy myself, but Draco? The freak could work at Cirque du Soleil. :DDDDDDDD

[blamebrampton.livejournal.com]

Oh Micey! I do love you so! Super-Bendy Draco made me LOL!

(And yes, I decided that I would not be one of the world's great smut writers when I started making myself giggle at my attempts. At that point I decided it could only stay if it was there for a laugh ;-)

[complications-g.livejournal.com]

This is great. :D

[blamebrampton.livejournal.com]

Cheers dear!

[arobynsung]

Limerick: Made me smile real wide. Thanks, I needed that.

Defriending Situation: If it's somebody you don't really interact with, I'd suggest you leave it. If it really bugs you though, you could message her and apologize for the mistake, these things happen. Maybe I'm not sensitive enough, but it's not that crucial.

Massage Woes: Will feel better in a few days, maybe.

Happy New Year!!
(yes I'm still saying that)

[blamebrampton.livejournal.com]

Yay smiles!

It's hard to know, I don't really interact with this person, but she seems sweet and young and I don't want her to feel it was anything personal, but then, if she just wanted to defriend me, then I don't want to stalk her! Argh!

And yes, the massage woes are rather woeful, I hope it does ease up soon.

If we say Happy New Year every day for the rest of the year, we might keep the jollity up!

[grey-hunter.livejournal.com]

Sadistic Chinese Massage Man? There should be a fic like that. :D

(Who is this author you speak of?)

[blamebrampton.livejournal.com]

There should be nothing like that! And the original should be beaten with my brush!

:-P You have actually read my few bits of shag-writing, so I will assume you are not pulling my leg!